Whatever happens, we'll be alright.

Any moment now, Lenihan will stand before the Dail – if they can restore order – and we’ll discover just how Fianna Fail are going to screw us all.

Well, I say all… what I mean is the majority. you know, most of the population including children and children yet to be born.

I said to my colleague Rob,

“They’re simply not competent to deal with this”.

Rob astutely replied,

“What worries me is that they probably are competent and they’re going to screw us for the benefit of themselves and their friends.”

I cut back,

“Or we’re going to be screwed by their friends – who will use the government to do it”.

Someone wrote into Newstalk and remarked that “the Government could have bought the banks for a few billion when their value had plummeted. But now it’s too late. They sat on their hands”. And we’ll be ruined.

I often say things like “the mere thought of ‘The Irish Business Community’ just fills me with loathing” etc. But then I remember that not all business people are amoral – or evil, for that matter.

Just some of them.

Enough of the parasites to cause titanic damage and hardship for everyone else. One of my brother’s-in-law who has a business is really struggling right now, but rather than take the easy option and sell it, he wants to keep his staff in employment. He’s not empire building – just doing the right thing. Taking a pay-cut, and then no pay at all.

We actually do need these driven types, with the big ideas. Not everyone has those qualities. Not only that, but even if you have loads of talent – which most business people lack in spades it’s bloody hard to make a living. So a large percentage of humanity need to be led and employed by others. Most big business people are, I’m afraid to say: a necessary evil.

I have to remind myself: Nothing’s ever just Black and White. Tell that to the anarchists.

Take that Cowell, you total non-talent

I wrote this months ago, but as I have limited time for – er, anything these days I thought I’d put it up.

I never watch those dreadful humiliation shows, so poupular on TV nowadays; but I did see this Britain’s got Talent video on YouTube. My goodness! What an amazing piece of television!

Genuine talent – and not some wannabe, nor a sort of autistic/savant phenomenon of exact replication. No, this is real, mature, personal talent. Isn’t that awful? What made me think of autism?

Cowel was thoroughly shown up. Expressions of eye-rolling boredom, pre-judged distaste – even disgust. Turning to surprise and suspicion. I was suspicious myself having never seen this multiple-train-wreck of a series, when the two presenters pressed the ‘play’ button on a hi-fi at stage-left. “Is she miming?” I wondered? Cowell clearly wondered the same thing. “This is a wind-up – they’re trying to catch me out – after all let’s not forget, this is all about me. How could someone so plain looking be allowed out in public? And on… gasp… television?

The rest of his brilliant shredding of bad children’s TV starts at 2.25mins. Don’t watch it from 0.00 as it’s a tribute to the Chuckle Bros.

Pure Gold: 'Peppa Pig'

After watching Pixar movies like an addict since Chrimbo – Johnny discovered the much simpler Peppa Pig and ‘Ben and Holly’s Little Kingdom’. Wonderful – genius animated programmes. Seriously, they are pure gold. I like them as much as he does. The design is so simple, the animation so rudimentary (though perfectly executed) it’s a wonder that the characters feel as real and funny as they do. But they do. Amazingly good little films.

More Genius: Ben & Hollys' Little Kingdom

The music is also excellent: Peppa’s exciting fast-paced intro is all marimbas and glockenspiels and makes you laugh just to hear it; Ben & Holly’s is pizzicato strings and banjos – but done with class and humour. The design is spot on too: simple. What a cop-out word that is. Sounds easy, but it isn’t.

And just to show that Brooker doesn’t only sneer, his programme finished with a warm tribute to the late creator of Children’s favourite classic ‘Bagpuss’ Oliver Postgate.

The Site Design (so far...)

I’m now hoping to use the main site as a vehicle for trying out some Flash Animation things. The Blog site will be for giving updates in a form that will allow easy interaction and comment.

I’m also using the whole thing as an exercise in creating many different web-channels if you like and making them work together. For example via: WordPress blogging, Flickr uploads, Facebook, LinkedIn, MySpace and perhaps RSS Feeds and Twitter.

I love the top tagline and the credits most of all

“Hey, I love that: John’s affectionately poking fun at all those wonderful 1950′s Sci-Fi B-movies.”.

No I’m not. I’m pouring – heaping – avalanching scorn on an absolutely crap genre of film-making. Forbidden Planet – a much loved movie, even by people who’ve never seen it – is probably one of the best of them but really, be honest: isn’t it more fun quoting from those godawful films and looking at the quirky stills than actually sitting through one of them? Ok, so you’re a film student, and you’re having some laughs at their total ineptness and feeling a bit superior – but really, shouldn’t they just be consigned to the recycling bin of hist..? oh, wait. that’s the trouble they have.

I must say though, ‘Ed Wood’ was wonderful movie: The worst filmmaker in the world meets Orson Welles in a cafe and they actually feel a creative connection. Woods’ sincere joy in what he’s doing is actually inspiring in itself. In Tim Burton’s and Johnny Depp’s portrayal of Woods, you get the impression that there was nothing cynical about what he was doing. He genuinely loved making those films. it was his passion. Almost like some of those Outsider Art people, his passion wasn’t matched by his ability – but it was a genuine passion none the less. I also enjoyed John Landis’ ‘Amazon Women on the Moon’. His swipes are affectionate.

New game show on telly tonight might be fun: You Have Been Watching. Charlie Brooker takes no prisoners when it comes to the dross that gets forced on the public. I sometimes think the media want to make people stupid, lower their expectations. The lower the critical faculties and expectationss: the easier to please.

Trouble is, you’ll need to watch telly to see it.

When you think about death do you lose your breath or
do you keep your cool?
Would you like to see the Pope on the end of a rope
do you think he’s a fool?
Well I have seen the truth, yes I’ve seen the light and I’ve changed my ways
And I’ll be prepared when you’re lonely and scared at the end of our days

Could it be you’re afraid of what your friends might say
If they knew you believe in God above?
They should realize before they criticize
that God is the only way to love

Is your mind so small that you have to fall
In with the pack wherever they run
Will you still sneer when death is near
And say they may as well worship the sun?

I think it was true it was people like you that crucified Christ
I think it is sad the opinion you had was the only one voiced
Will you be so sure when your day is near, say you don’t believe?
You had the chance but you turned it down, now you can’t retrieve

Perhaps you’ll think before you say that God is dead and gone
Open your eyes, just realize that he’s the one
The only one who can save you now from all this sin and hate
Or will you still jeer at all you hear? Yes! I think it’s too late.

I’ll give you a hint (Google it) ‘After Forever‘. Life’s full of surprises isn’t it?

“Tragedy is when I cut my finger.
Comedy is when you walk into an open sewer and die.”

Is that ‘Shadenfreude’?

Forget ‘Men in Tights’ – his film ‘The Producers’ is to my mind, the funniest film ever made (except maybe for Monty Python’s ‘Life of Brian’). Featuring tragic comedy genius Zero Mostel. I say tragic because he was blacklisted during the Senator McCarthy Witch-hunts.

He also did an Arena show years ago – interviewed by Alan Yentob. Brooks was hilarious, and nuts. He made Robin Williams’ television guest appearances look Narcoleptic.

Oh the joy on our little faces as we stood at the window here on Leeson Street and laughed our arses off.

It's the little things that bring such joy. You just need to be open to them and they will come your way.

Wise Fr.Fergus standing beside me said – once again:

“One should never take pleasure in the suffering of others. It’s a sin.”

Funnily enough, I’d been quoting him on that lately in relation to Fianna Fail’s woes in the elections. Hard to tell though if Fergus was being sarcastic. I certainly was. He said the Germans have a word for it: “SHADENFREUDE” (he wrote it down for me). Basically: joy or pleasure in others’ hardship.

Anyway, I just thought I’d relate theses lovely few moments of bliss which we shared. Just open your heart – and the good things will come. Life’s not all crap.

Here’s a link for those who park illegally using their hazard lights as a bane against traffic wardens. It’ll explain a few things to you “Why we clamp and tow-away vehicles” >